Back To Center

Last night was a small but much-needed mommy night out. I forget how well I do with just a few hours to recharge. I met a friend, Colleen, and we got pretty fall manicures, and then went around the corner to a local bar for some food and drinks... Because when don't I need to bring food and drinks into the mix?

So many jewel tones, not enough time. I went with #92 - Down To Earth.
It's a beautiful camo-green!

It's a lot, working from home and raising two babies. I find it hard to separate the two sometimes. Too often, I treat my babies like tasks, or only give them my very divided attention - and it leaves me feeling completely sad, and like I've failed as a mom and employee. Is this what working from home is supposed to accomplish?

Simon Pierce - 8 months old & Porter Alan - 2.5 years old

No. Working from home gives me the chance to be there for moments like this... When they're crawling around together and laughing and exploring and just being brothers. Moments like this make the "sharpie on the carpet/nap strikes/food strikes/must have apple juice NOW" moments far less important.

But, the crazy moments also remind me quickly that I'm human... I'm an adult human. I'm not the kid that runs away from her problems anymore, I have to face them head on. When I'm feeling deflated and tired and just worn down, I have to deal with that like an adult. And since I've made the decision to not deal with my problems by acting out (partying, drinking, drugs, anger), I have to discover new ways to face and conquer the challenges in my life, in the moment. Because let's be honest: mommy nights out can't happen every night. Ha.

• Perspective. That's my biggest tool. Remembering those fleeting moments when Simon was two months old and we thought he was blind, or worse, that his body was filled with disease. Those were big issues. The fact that he wants me to hold him all day? Not an issue. An inconvenience, I guess, but not an issue. I see so many posts these days about accidents, and disease, and families truly facing the worst possible heartache... so my perspective shifts. I remember how blessed we are, and that I need to not act like my life is falling apart because Porter wants to drum his heart out while I'm on a phone call for work. God forbid, we could face some true challenges someday - but we're not. And I am so grateful and appreciative of the His hand on our lives.

• Prayer. I don't really have much to say about this, except for that I'm constantly trying to give it to God. I'm waiting for Him to throw up His hands like "Girl, no", but it hasn't happened yet. Hallelujah. My God is great.

• Mommy time-outs. Those are moments that I just lock myself in the laundry room for a minute to regain my composure so I don't say or do something I shouldn't. This works sometimes, too.

• IPads. Those have been my saving grace these days, when I'm not riddled with guilt for shoving an electronic in my son's hands and allowing him to zone out on Kid's YouTube. But when I have to get something done, necessity trumps all else, and he gets to watch creepy tutorials of grown adults opening eggs and talking in Disney voices.

• Reality Checks. For example: my husband is not the enemy because he has a job outside the home. I could go back to work outside the home, too, so I have to remind myself not to be a brat because I've made the decision not to. I'm guilty of making him feel like less of a parent because he "doesn't have to hear it all day long" as Porter rages about not being able to eat chili for breakfast. It doesn't make it any less annoying for Paul when he's home in the mornings, does it?

What are ways that you bring yourself back to center,
so you have the focus and energy to conquer your day?