A vacation with kids is not a vacation at all.

I live for vacations. Which is a little troublesome, since I feel like we don't take many. Haha... but, we planned this vacation a few weeks ago, to celebrate my husband's and Jen's birthdays in a snowy little town called Leavenworth, and to say we were all a little excited was an understatement.

Not only was this our first vacation as a group in quite some time, but this was the first time we were escaping together WITH OUR KIDS.

We questioned whether this would be a vacation at all, actually. Jessica and Davey's boys are older (meaning, they can use a toilet and put themselves to sleep), but Porter and Lincoln are 14 months and 9 months old. They still nurse, they still wake up a few times during the night, they are obviously still in diapers and need to be entertained and watched 24/7.

So, basically, this was a different experience entirely.

Here are a few ways vacation with toddlers is not a vacation at all.

• Stairs. Omg, do you guys realize that most houses are - by nature - BABY DEATHTRAPS? And this genius of a mother (talking about me) doesn't own a baby gate... because, you know, I like to live on the edge. The house we stayed at was three floors, with like a billion flights of stairs. I had to get creative, creating blockades with unused ottomans and dining room chairs on their sides. Porter is like a moth to a flame when it comes to stairs. He will drop anything he is doing to climb up some stairs; if he sees an opportunity, the stairs are like a irresistible, shining beacon of fun and imminent danger. He will RUN to them. So, when I successfully block off all the landings and I am thinking to myself "WINNING!", he scales the wall and climbs up the banister. I. Am. Not. Kidding.
• Babies Don't Care About Sleeping In. Porter and I came downstairs at 6am a few mornings we were away, and were promptly greeted by our friends Jen and Lincoln. Oh, hey guys. No sleeping in for you either? Not gonna lie, I was a little jealous that the Jones boys were still sleeping (as were their parents). I pretended to be all panicky when Porter started playing his xylophone outside of Jess and Davey's room, but I was secretly all "muahaha" when Jessica flung open the door and stumbled out half-asleep to the bathroom. I mean, I know she's earned her sleeping in (three kids later and blah blah blah)... but if Jen and I are awake and sucking down coffee, you will be awake and sucking down your lemon water, Mrs. Jones.
• You Can't Take Kids Into A Bar. When we were sledding, some kind stranger - (actually, I'm not sure who told us - I had retired to the car early because I had a frozen Porter Popsicle. So, yeah, I just waited in the car for everyone else to finish having a blast. Yet another reason why this vacation is now different, but I'll just keep moving for the sake of word count) - so anyway, so stranger told us that this little hole-in-the-wall down the road has the BEST pizza in town. Well, turns out, it was the town bar. Jen, Jess and I stayed in the car with all the kids while the guys ordered and waited for our to-go pizza. That in itself is super annoying - especially with a cranky toddler needing a nap and not at all pleased to be sitting in an cold, non-running car.
• Vacation Language Isn't A Thing. We have this joke about saying and doing whatever we want on vacation - after all, it's vacation! If I want to have Doritos for breakfast, I will. We talk about married things, we laugh at inappropriate jokes, we play intense games of Heads Up and Catchphrase and - err - Uno, and... things can get heated. A few of us hate losing (Paul), a few of us cheat (Jessica), and a few of us may have mouths like sailors (Me, Jen). I know, you're shocked. Well. Kids don't understand the good nature of this, and pretty soon Jackson Jones is wandering the house telling the little kids to stop being "so damn loud. That crap is annoying". Oops.

So yeah, anyway... bottom line, I joke around - but it was a blast. I loved hanging out with our families and making so many new memories. One of my favorites: the older kids played Xbox downstairs, and told us a few times they were going to go "pwn some noobs". We were like... "what are you even saying."

Jess got really nervous, but didn't want to make her kids feel like she didn't trust them, so we did what every logical parent in 2014 does: we Urban Dictionaried it. Turns out, it is to completely obliterate your opponent in any event where there is competition, though the term specifically originated from Online Gaming. Very similar in nature as "owning new players". Phew.

You learn something new every day.

Our cabin for the weekend!

Adventures in San Francisco

This past weekend, we enjoyed beautiful San Francisco as a family. It was beyond amazing; I love, love, love that city. I wasn't sure what I was expecting, but it certainly wasn't to move SF up to my top three favorites cities ever! But, alas -- that's where you can now find it. Top 3 Favorite Cities. Ever.

We flew down for my work retreat (my company is based out of SF). So, along with exploring a new city, I got to meet all the people I've only known virtually for nearly 2 years. It was crazy... putting faces to voices, sharing inside jokes that we've only ever laughed about over IM or email. It was a blast. I'm blessed to work for an amazing company.

My husband was scheduled to fly down with us (Porter and me), but then he was invited to attend a conference in LA for our church (where he works). So, on Friday AM - at 4am - Porter and I were picked up by our friends, Richard and Ashley (Ashley also works for the same company, which is great!) and I flew down sans husband -- Porter's first flight ever.

I was beyond nervous. I'm independent and all, but something about being a new mom sort of takes you down three notches. What if Porter was that baby on the plane? And I was alone, unarmed? No backup? How was I going to carry a suitcase, a diaper bag, a laptop bag, a stroller and a carseat by myself through security and onto the plane?

Turns out, people are pretty nice to traveling moms -- especially traveling moms that are alone and unarmed. It wasn't that bad. Next time, I would probably try to condense even more, and I would have definitely utilized my Ergo carrier sooner than I did. Either way, it's a workout. Porter is no dainty little kiddo... he's 23 pounds of solid CHUNK. He weighs the same as his 18 month old cousin, and she feels about 10 pounds lighter, because she's taller. He is just a solid mass of baby fat. I love it to death, but not so fun when you have no one to relieve you of child-toting duties.

We also booked an apartment to stay at on the website Airbnb... have you ever heard of it? Absolutely amazing. Well, scary -- I mean, you're staying at people's apartments or homes -- but we had an amazing experience. I feel like we made a new friend. Natalie was so sweet, and we were so grateful to be staying in a 2 bedroom flat. With two babies under one year old, being sardined into a small hotel room would have been torture. 

The apartment was spacious, uncluttered, clean and somewhat kidproofed -- Natalie, the homeowner, has a two year old daughter. Ironically, Natalie was leaving down this particular weekend for a work trip... to Seattle. So, it was fate. :)

Some awesome highlights from San Francisco:

• People are so nice. People are not that nice in Seattle.
• Painted Ladies. I definitely hung out of the window of our rental car singing the Full House theme song at the top of my lungs as we looked for a place to park at Alamo Square Park. Such a tourist I am.
• ARCHITECTURE. The detail in all the homes and buildings is just so intricate.
• FOOD. Oh my gosh, SF has is heaven for foodies. So many amazing restaurants. I feel like we only got a glimpse, but my glimpse included a gourmet grilled cheese, so I'm not even mad.
• Our apartment. It was a perfect location for everything we wanted to do.
• ZipCar. It was amazing to have a full-sized SUV to drive around with.
• Parks, parks, and more parks! I need to be there for a full month, you guys, just to visit all of the amazing parks.
• Fisherman's Wharf. So much to do, so many shops, so many restaurants.
• Those ridiculous 10-person bicycles that you can rent. So cool. I needed to have done that, too.
• Alcatraz. We didn't go, but I saw it from the Wharf. It was pretty amazing.
• The Bay Bridge, lit up. The most gorgeous thing I have ever seen.
• The view from Treasure Island (over the Bay Bridge). STUNNING. All bright and lit up, with just a glimmer of fog floating over the tops of the highest buildings. So perfect.
• THE FOG. It rolls in like powered by a freaking fog machine, you guys. It's thick and has a personality of it's own.
• De Young Museum, in Golden Gate Park. Sweeping, 360º views of the city. So pretty.

The real Full House house. :) It was painted darker and had a gate up with a No Trespassing sign. I can only imagine how annoying it must be to live there and have to deal with hundreds of photographers

Paul flew in on Saturday evening, and met us at Starbelly, where we were having a fun company dinner. It was so amazing to see him. Porter was so glad to have his daddy.

This picture doesn't do it justice, but this is the view from Treasure Island. It's moments like this that I wish I had a full-sized camera. I wish I could remember the detail of this view forever.

And, err, some lowlights:

• I dropped/shattered my iPhone getting out of the car.
• I got sick. Horrible head cold. And unfortunately, I passed it to my hubby and Porter. Poor boys. I'm doing better, but they're both still fighting it.
• Traffic. Eww. At 9pm! Freeways are really a parking lot at 9pm!?
• There was a BART strike. Super lame that I didn't get to experience that... and it made traffic that much worse.

I'm already debating when to plan my next trip back to this fabulous city. Have you ever been? What is your "must do/see" for San Francisco?

Self-Proclaimed: Foodie

I don't know if I'm an actual foodie, by definition of the word, or if I just enjoy eating, so I was beyond ecstatic to put a title to it. I mean, "foodie" sounds so much better than "glutton" or "bottomless pit". I'm a lady, after all.