She May Be The Youngest Person I've Ever Hated

Kaia Crawford. She's eleven, you guys... are you kidding me?

She's a freak of nature. A beautiful, supermodel-coursing-through-her-veins, dresses-better-than-me, cheekbones-higher-than-Snoop freak of nature.

That's all.

Image Souce: E! Online

The One Where Taylor Swift Emailed Me

I used to work at a real estate office, and back in those days - before Spotify or Pandora - MSN Radio was awesome. So was Myspace. I often picked the "Today's Country" station to jam out to while I processed Purchase & Sales and New Construction listings, and it's here where I can tell you that I absolutely discovered Taylor Swift.

Fine. So I didn't discover her, per say. But close. I was, like, one of the first people to listen to her song on MSN radio. Even before it came out on the actual radio.

When I heard her single, Tim McGraw, I was hooked. There was no picture of Taylor on the MSN feed, just her adorable voice and stupid catchy lyrics. I Googled her relentlessly, not much to be found - except for a lonely looking Myspace page.

I sent her a message.

"Hey! Heard you on MSN Radio! Love your Tim McGraw song! Do you have any more music?"

She wrote me back. IT WAS BEFORE SHE WAS FAMOUS GUYS, DON'T RAIN ON MY PARADE WITH ALL YOUR "IT WAS AN AUTOMATED RESPONSE" CRAP. IT'S REAL.

Ok, so maybe it was an automated response.

I remember I didn't care too much when I got the message back; I absentmindedly skimmed over it and left it in my inbox for months. Then she became famous and six years later I went crazy digging through old Myspace archives to find our email exchange.

Now I'm all "how much can I sell these screenshots for".

Morbid Confession Monday

I titled this like I have more than one morbid confession. I don't. At least, I don't think I do. I suppose you should stay tuned. Please still be my friends, I promise I'm optimistic and lifegiving 99% of the time. Ok, 79%.

Anyway. Here it is: I used to create the next day's newspaper headlines in my head, if I found myself in a situation that is less than desirable. It started out as a funny habit, like if I was with my friends and they did something ridiculous.

Pretty Brunette and Preppy Blonde Bail Fashionable Asian Friend From Jail; Local Store Associates Say Uggs were Stuffed Full of Nail Polish

Then, it started to happen when I was freaked out. Like when I'm home alone: Husband Out of Town; Young Wife Kidnapped From Home. I will then jump out of bed and recheck the doors for the fifteenth time, just to be sure I locked them correctly.

When I'm walking to my car late at night, alone, in the dark: Young Woman Attacked In Nordstrom Parking Lot; Police Have No Suspects.

I mean, who does that!?

I try to keep myself focused on happy thoughts, since, you know... it's probably not healthy to be plotting my trials via headlining news. But lately, I try to do it for happy scenarios too: Baby Sleeps For Thirteen Hours; Family Says Mom Is Rested and Confused!

Local Woman Eats Her Body Weight In Holiday Reese's; Wakes Up 10lbs Lighter, Thanks Breastfeeding

Young Woman Breaks World Record: 36+ Hours Playing iPhone Solitaire!

Do you have any weird or embarrassing habits?

How To Be Happy Forever: Maintaining Date Nights

It's Monday.

Mondays are my favorite. When Paul and I got married, we honeymooned in Mexico, and on a long, hot walk to the closest Starbucks (it's incredible, the lengths that Seattleites will go to get a Starbucks coffee; I mean, our timeshare was in rather shady part of of Los Cabos. On our drive in from the airport, we literally witnessed a man get out of his truck in the middle of traffic, walk to the car behind him, pull out the driver and start beating him relentlessly. I'm not kidding. In the middle of traffic, and people just kept driving by. No rubbernecking, no police. It was just... normal. I wanted to die. And yeah. We walked to Starbucks two days later, down that same street. Like two animals.)

Anyway (clearly I wander off topic quite easily): Mondays. My favorite. On that long, hot walk to for an iced Americano and an iced vanilla latte, only days after we said "I do", we talked about the importance of maintaining a date night. We were bound and determined to never be "that couple": the ones that somehow let themselves go. It starts by postponing a date night, and then it's an uphill battle from there. It starts with a cancelled date night, and then before you know it, you can't remember the last time you sat across the table from each other, talking about your first kiss, or laughing about the day you found out you were pregnant and how you broke down in tears and sat in corner of your bedroom crying about how much it was going to hurt.

No? Just me? Anyway. Back on track:

We promised - pinky swore, even - to always, always, always honor our date night. Even if we had no plans, or were saving money, or were homebound with a newborn... date night would always be Monday, and it would always be a priority. I'm not sure why we picked Monday, but I'm almost positive it had something to do with the fact that Mondays have a bad rep... so we decided to give them a little dose of happy. You're welcome, Monday.

Since we've became parents, we've found time to slip away on Mondays. For a Target run. A Costco trip (like tonight). Out to sushi, or to the mall to browser Nordstrom or H&M for clothes that we don't need but will probably buy anyway. Whatever we do, wherever we are... Mondays are ours.

Sure, we've missed a couple. We've had Monday night work meetings that we couldn't get out of, or a girlfriend's birthday dinner that was required, or a football game that just had to be viewed out and about with the guys. But we try our hardest to plan those times in advance, so we can move our date night to another night that week.

I'm happy that it's 2013, almost three years later, and Mondays are still ours. And they probably always will be.

May Challenge!

Jumping in on this awesome May challenge! Check out Jenni's blog to link up each day! I can't wait :)

Here are the rules, from Jenni:

1. There really aren't any rules. If you miss a day, you can make it up or skip it. The blog police will not come knocking.

2. I will be including a linkup option at the bottom of my post each day, so you are welcome to leave your links here for others to peruse, as well. 

3. You can still post other things every day, too.

4. I'd seriously love you if you also include the "blog every day in May" button (below) either on your sidebar or at the end of your posts, but again, the blog police will not come knocking. My main goal here is to get us all back to the basics of blogging, not to gain a million new readers (though I wouldn't mind that). 

5. Here are the topics. You can be as creative and awesome or as boring and bland as you like with these. Take 'em and run with it. Use creative post titles. Interpret each "prompt" however you like. There's no wrong way to do it. Have fun.

Day 1, Wednesday: The story of your life in 250 words or less (or one paragraph... no one will be counting your words... probably)
Day 2, Thursday: Educate us on something you know alot about or are good at. Take any approach you'd like (serious and educational or funny and sarcastic)
Day 3, Friday: Things that make you uncomfortable
Day 4, Saturday: Favorite quote (from a person, from a book, etc) and why you love it
Day 5, Sunday: Publicly profess your love and devotion for one of your blogger friends. What makes them great? Why do you love them? If you don't have blogger friends, talk about a real-life friend or even a family member
Day 6, Monday: If you couldn't answer with your job, how would you answer the question, 'what do you do'?
Day 7, Tuesday: The thing(s) you're most afraid of
Day 8, Wednesday: A piece of advice you have for others. Anything at all.
Day 9, Thursday: A moment in your day (this can be just a photo or both a photo and words)
Day 10, Friday: Most embarrassing moment (s). Spill. 
Day 11, Saturday: Sell yourself in 10 words words or less
Day 12, Sunday: What do you miss? (a person, a thing, a place, a time of your life...)
Day 13, Monday: Issue a public apology. This can be as funny or as serious or as creative as you want it to be.
Day 14, Tuesday: Ten things that make you really happy
Day 15, Wednesday: A Day in the life (include photos from throughout your typical day - this could be "a photo an hour" if you'd like)
Day 16, Thursday: Something difficult about your "lot in life" and how you're working to overcome it
Day 17, Friday: A favorite photo of yourself and why
Day 18, Saturday: Tell a story from your childhood. Dig deep and try to be descriptive about what you remember and how you felt.
Day 19, Sunday: Five of your favorite blogs and what you love about them
Day 20, Monday: Get real. Share something you're struggling with right now.
Day 21, Tuesday: A list of links to your favorite posts in your archives
Day 22, Wednesday: Rant about something. Get up on your soapbox and tell us how you really feel. (a pet peeve, a current event, a controversial topic, something your husband or roommate or neighbor or boss does that really ticks you off)
Day 23, Thursday: Things you've learned that school won't teach you
Day 24, Friday: Your top 3 worst traits
Day 25, Saturday: Something someone told you about yourself that you'll never forget (good or bad)
Day 26, Sunday: Something you read online. Leave a link and discuss, if you'd like.
Day 27, Monday: A letter to your readers
Day 28, Tuesday: Only pictures
Day 29, Wednesday: Five songs or pieces of music that speak to you or bring back memories. Use Grooveshark or YouTube to include them in the post
Day 30, Thursday: React to this term: Letting Go

Day 31, Friday: A vivid memory

New Favorite Food. Until Tomorrow.

I would like to announce that I officially have a favorite food. No more debating between Italian or Mexican. No more yearning for good Pad Thai. No more heart palpitations over a good roll of sushi.

I have discovered what I could eat every single day for the rest of my life. And, shockingly enough, it's none of the above.

Are you ready for this?

Avocado toast.

Image from: whatsgabycooking.com

Now, if I'm being honest, it's just guacamole on bread, and there's nothing impressive about that anything on bread is freaking awesome. However, it's much easier than whipping up some fantastic guacamole to put on some bread. You guys: it's guacamole, dialed down. Back to it's roots. It's just a diced avocado, some garlic salt or coarse sea salt and lots of pepper... smothered on whole grain toast. If you're feeling really fun, throw on a slice of fresh turkey, or a few pieces of tomato.

It's filling and delicious and now I want five more pieces of it. Have it tomorrow for breakfast. Or for lunch... or dinner. Or even as a midnight snack. This is one of those things that would make sense at any time of the day, kind of like Reese's Peanut Butter Cups.

Ok, not like Reese's. It's nothing like Reese's PB Cups.

Just try it.

Currently Loving: Scandal

This show. I'm in love.

I kind of want to be Olivia Pope. Or at least one of her Gladiators in a suit. I'd heard a lot of people talk about how much they loved this show, so one fateful Tuesday night, Hubby and I decided to watch Season 1 on Netflix...

... and I bought a trial subscription on Hulu so we could continue into Season 2. It's good, folks. Like... really good.

Although, I'm really confused and amazed as to how I feel ok rooting for the mistress... that's not like me. But, once you get to know President Grant and Mellie... you kind of have to root for the mistress, don't you? I mean... sheesh.

Plus, Olivia Pope's wardrobe alone could have it's own spinoff. So many glamorous pantsuits and vintage blazers, I can hardly stand it.

Dang you, Shonda Rhimes and your brilliantly written masterpieces! (RIP, Private Practice and Seasons 1 through whatever-season-Izzy-left of Grey's Anatomy)

WATCH THIS SHOW.

What My Husband Says About Me

Last night, I asked my husband to do this blogging link-up for me. All he had to do was write some facts/thoughts about me. He agreed immediately.

Now, my husband is a romantic. He surprises me with overnight getaways in Seattle and flowers or little gifts on the 8th of every month (the day we got married, back in October 2010), and he constantly tells me how much he loves me. So, I admit: I kinda expected a real lovey-dovey write up about his beloved wife.

Welp. Not so much.

I saw another blogger do this, so I'm going to, too: I will include my comments in bold. Because some of these things HAVE to have my context. You know how guys are. :)

SOME THINGS ABOUT CORIANNE

• She is a world champion equestrian
  
• She has a heart shaped mole on her head that she makes me check once a week to make sure it hasn't changed. (You can never be too careful! He rolls his eyes 9 times out of 10 when I ask him to look at it. I'm obviously the Googler in the family.)
  
• She's "started" like 500 blogs, She's also "started" like 500 twitter accounts and She still has a Myspace login. (I've only started two Twitter accounts, jerk. And yeah, like 500 blogs.)
  
• I can always tell when she is writing something clever because she will be smirking while she is typing.
  
• She is the best encourager a Husband could ask for.
  
• She tried to lie saying that she made up, "#imfunny" Which I totally did!!! (We like to "speak in Twitter" sometimes. We will announce "#awesome", as if somehow our life can be categorized by verbal hashtags. One day, driving home, I remember announcing "#imfunny" after I made him laugh about something stupid. He swears that he is, in fact, the one that coined #imfunny after making me laugh. I wonder sometimes if we were in two separate cars... because I totally said it.)
  
• She only laughs when she quotes Friends lines. When I try, she completely ignores me. (Yeah, this is true, and I don't know why. I love when he quotes lines from Friends, especially because he wasn't really a fan of the show before we started dating)
  
• She hates when people don't like her
  
• She cries watching The Bachelor (I scoffed when I read this, I honestly don't remember ever crying when I watch that show. But hey, these are his "10 things".)
  
• She once peed her romper. (I don't even want to get into it, but just know that there's more to this story. And he wasn't even there. It includes a crowded bathroom, a full bladder, and trying to get fancy with how I - err, maneuvered - out of my cute little summer romper one night in July.)

Porter's Wishlist

Ok, so, this is less "Porter's Wishlist", and more "Mommy's Wishlist". Dressing a boy is a lot of fun. I'll admit, the one thing I was sad about when I found out I was having a little guy is that I wouldn't get to dress him in vintage rose prints and pink-n-grey damask leggings under a buttery yellow tutu.

However.

Trends these days are making my boy-dressing-days extremely exciting. Chambray and clashing prints and baby designer jeans... yes, please. And seriously - unisex leggings? Yes, yes, a thousand times yes. Sometimes it's game. How many different prints can I put Porter in before it's "too much"? This weekend, he wore camo leggings, a vintage-looking Team USA Nordstrom tee, and a red/white striped beanie. That, with his big baby blues, and he was a little baby knockout.

Ugh. Have I mentioned how much I love my boy?

Take a look at some of my recent favorites for Porter: Nordstrom, Baby Gap, H&M, Old Navy Kids and Etsy are some of my favorite places to browse. And yes, I realize the jeans are technically for girls, but I'm just not convinced.

ON THE BOARD:

Moncler 'Patrick' Hooded Vest (Infant)
nordstrom.com

BOSS Kidswear Stripe Cardigan (Infant) Navy/ Grey 18M
nordstrom.com

Gap Chambray Anorak Pullover
gap.com

adidas 'Superstar 2' Crib Shoe (Infant)
nordstrom.com

Kids Baby Girl Size 4-24m
hm.com

Jellycat 'Bashful' Puppy Rattle
nordstrom.com

Hand printed organic kids leggings tribal print/ aztec print...
etsy.com

TGIF: Sentimental Journey

http://todayentertainment.today.com

I know I'm probably late to the game, but Emmy Rossum is amazing. I happened to catch her on Kathie Lee and Hoda (The Today Show) this morning, and she blew me away. I think I knew she "could sing", but I didn't realize she had a jazz/blues album out. I just thought she "could sing" like several other actresses have claimed in the past. (Yeah, I'm looking at you, LiLo.)

She's such an old soul. The album is beautiful; this was the best way to end my work week, ever. I'm sipping coffee, and listening to my new girl crush sing to me in French. Win, win.

If you haven't yet, get the album and ease gracefully into the upcoming weekend.

Who got the BOOCH?

(Haha, see what I did there?)

Anyway. Once upon a time, I decided to try something healthy. And I'm talking about the time I decided to only drink regular Coke instead of Diet Coke because, eww, aspartame.

I was 39 weeks pregnant, and was on my way home from a scary overnight stay at the hospital (my anxiety was getting the best of me, my blood pressure had skyrocketed). We stopped at a neighborhood grocery store, and I decided to try Kombucha. I wanted to see what all the fuss was about, and there's nothing like a freak hospital stay to scare the health into you.

Five Things [Private Island Menu Edition]

From The Daily Post:

You’ve being exiled to a private island, and your captors will only supply you with five foods. What do you pick?

This is so hard. Like, really hard. I like food. If I could only have five foods, it would break my heart. But, I think I have finally narrowed it down into a great, well-rounded group of five of my favorite foods.

I'm also going to assume that my own private island is chock-full of things like fresh mangos and coconuts, so none of my five will be in the fruit family.

In no particular order, I present to you... the list.

I prayed over this list, you guys. This is major. I'm feeling a little bit of buyers remorse over adding the chicken enchiladas (French Fries? Pad Thai? Mashed potatoes? STEAK?), but I can't live without Mexican. It's serious.

• Spaghetti w/fresh parmesan
• Lobster Rolls from Todd English PUB
• My mom's Asian Chicken Salad
• Enchiladas w/rice and beans + sour cream
• Brownies (the fudge-y kind, not the cake-y ones) with chocolate frosting. Girlfriend needs her chocolate.

What would be your five things?

I want to host SNL.

Have you SEEN the way they make the hosts look in those amazing photos?

I mean. Flawless.

Melissa McCarthy looks like she should be a model. HELLO. Love, love, love these pics. So fun.

Friday's Letters

Dear Happy Hour Sushi, you are amazing. Especially on a Monday. I appreciate you getting my week off to a stellar start.

Dear Washington, thank you for two exceptionally sunny spring days this week. The rest of the world may scoff at my appreciation over blue skies in April... but unless you live here, you just couldn't possibly understand.

Dear Scentsy, thank you for making a bar that smells suspiciously like the perfume that you pump through the ventilation system in several of our favorite Las Vegas hotels. I feel like I'm on vacation in my living room -- minus the all you can eat buffets, jingling slot machines, and basically anything else that is awesome.

Dear Weddings with a 3 month old, just no.

Dear Reese's EASTER Eggs, please get out of my life.